Yabadabadoo!
Recessions can be a terrible thing. Confidence is lost, the future looks bleak and life is unpredictable.
But not for me, hooray!!
I may have landed in the shit, but I've come out smelling of roses and all those initial months of disasterous pr gaffes are long forgotten.
Although we've given lots of your money away to the banks as a reward for their incompetence, 60 years from now we'll be reaping the benefits as our shares hit the roof. I know that we might also have to raise taxes because we do have to ensure that our house remains in order, just like you do (if you still have one), but in our new 5-year plan we aim to have 9 out of 10 families hunting for their own food.
We know that OPEC are going to reduce the production of oil because the billions they are making isn't enough but we reckon we've got an ace in the hole. We're going to abolish ALL vehicles and invest in new state-of-the-art pedal cars as part of a healthier lifestyle.
Since the building and construction market has been near decimated, we're going to promote cave dwelling and all those who were employed in this industry will be retrained as hunters and gatherers (a certificate guaranteed on completion of the training course).
This will all be part of the "Back to the Future" campaign and we think it is a winner.
All the bestGordon B
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