Lloyds Boss Cleans in One Lick

It was suggested that Lloyds boss Eck Daniels should come clean on whether he actually pays UK tax or not.

Unfortunately he may have thought a wager had been made that he couldn't cleans every part of his anatomy with his reputedly large tongue.

Our Insider said "It seems that the only thing CEOs and other high execs seem to be good at these days is extracting good terms of employment for below par performances. Some people just don't have the balls to even pay tax like everyone else. Maybe someone should give them a good clean. It might improve their morals."

1st Class Con

It was revealed that Dutch despatch company TIT have been involved in a wide range of racketeering and scams including non-payment of taxes. Worse than that, their staff were encouraged to proliferate Dutch ethics by incorporating subliminal messages in the post they handled.

Our insider said "Messages like 'grass is good' and 'plead for weed' were known to have been embedded in the post they handled."

This was all too disturbing for backbenchers in Parliament as the Government propose to tap into a bit of Thatcherism by flogging off the Royal Mail.